Saturday 3 January 2009

Tommy Sheridan on Celebrity Big Brother: the Madness of George II


Oh. My. God. He actually did it. Tommy Sheridan leaps in where angels fear to tread and gets a new bail address.

After MP George Galloway’s performance in the 2006 Celebrity Big Brother season 6, where he took the awesome combat skills he’d wielded to such great effect in the US Senate on the issue of the Iraq war and used them on his sweet young co-contestants, you’d think politicians would give reality shows a wide berth. Shooting minnows with a bazooka is not something the British public considers endearing. Yet. What profit a man that he gain a radio show but lose the respect of the multitudes ?

Is Tommy, a former Scottish Socialist Party MSP and now Solidarity leader, like all politicians — so in love with himself he assumes that to see him is to love him? Well, he’s managed to get me calling him the more familiar “Tommy” instead of “Sheridan”, so there’s a start.

Last night Tommy risked all during a crucial period when he is under investigation for perjury, and entered the CBB house along with ten other “celebrities” (can socialists please unpack that term?). He got the worst reception of all with the crowd booing his entrance. Even the hardened Davina McCall called it, “Harsh”. Considering so few of the Big Brother audience even knows who he is, arousing so raucous a response took some doing.

Davina went on: “He thinks the Big Brother House will be more regimented than prison.” Ooh, there’s a swipe. Ratting on his claim to a “great friendship with George Galloway” probably did him few favours with this particular audience, either.

You have to admire his chutzpah for playing his hand like this with so much at stake. He is probably more desperate than any of the other contestants, and that's in a line-up that includes Ulrika Johnson. Tommy wants a wider audience as a Man of the People. Great. That’s the entire CBB audience who will now be finding out what it is, exactly, the perjury charge is about.

Mind you, he could come out of it better the way Robert Kilroy Silk did from I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here, when he waded through crap and creepy-crawlies for our amusement and never complained. Do we think Tommy will likewise make us proud of him? What helped Kilroy, of course, was the addition of Timmy Mallet, the evil shrimp with the serial killer laugh, against whom even a steaming pile of poo would look good. But I’m not so sure there’s a villain in the CBB house who’ll make him shine.

Rapper Coolio’s temper and sexism (he doesn’t want any “ugly chicks” in the house) might afford Tommy the opportunity to show he has the Right Stuff. But remember how Galloway sucked up to Dennis Rodman in 2006? Will fear of conflict with an alpha male and the urge to male-bond override Tommy’s anti-sexist credentials? (Fnaargh! I just read what I wrote there!) It’ll be down to what’s expedient, what's principled, and won’t that give us lots of fun working out which is which?

Will he acquit himself? They’re all on their best behaviour now but will the dreaded finger-wagging creep into his interactions as conditioned by years on the left? He does have 20 years with Militant, remember.

The game will be to see who reverses expectations. Terry Christian has already impressed me with his observation that our political masters don’t want us participating in politics, and his story about the Lancashire publican during World War II who responded to the US officer’s demand that he instate a colour bar with a sign saying, “Black troops only”, was quite moving. Can Tommy do it? Can he repress the urge to blurt “And another thing, comrades ...”.

George Galloway gives his chum tips for success in The Daily Record: “Don't get involved in any arguments. Although history has absolved me re sleazy Michael Barrymore and sneaky Preston, at the time, I paid the ultimate price - eviction after 22 days.” George, you are delusional, mate. Did you not learn anything?

Poor George suffered mightily and cried all the way to a massive radio show. And now Tommy can count on the support of Galloway’s 800,000 listeners, plus The Daily Record, Tommy being their pin-up, a bit like Lucy Pinder in the Star.

It would be great to see him representing socialism at its best but I have a horrible feeling in my gut that has nothing to do with seasonal over-indulgence.

Madam Miaow says ... If he don’t act shit, you must acquit.

Also blogging on Tommy in CBB, AVPS and Splinty.

Let’s revisit some highlights.
Bewildered by a small puppy
Kitty love


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22 comments:

splinteredsunrise said...

Ha ha ha... just wait for them to break out the leotards. On second thoughts, maybe not.

It's up to him though isn't it? George really shouldn't have been there, but he behaved in such a bad way he undermined himself. Tommy shouldn't be there, but if he plays his cards right people might warm to him.

And then there's always Talksport. With George's enemies like Whale and Gaunty exiting, there may just be a spare slot...

Madam Miaow said...

You've just reminded me ... OK, links to leotard and cat going up ...

claude said...

...Exactly! There's always talksport. Galloway first and Sheriday second didn't get on Big Brother because of narcissism. No. Never.

Madam Miaow said...

Narcissism, Claude? How can you impugn the fine reputations of our fabulous socialist leaders like this? They make these noble sacrifices in order to advance the class. I know it's true coz they told us so.

rustbeltradical said...

Well at least in Britain your left is given the public space to act a fool. We have to do all of ours in private....

FullFathomFive said...

Delicious run down Mme M. What astounds me is that way in which celeb culture, having been embraced by the political establishment, also functions as a conventient absorber of charismatic leftists. What better way to neutralize dissent than to broadcast the ritual humiliation of characters like Galloway & Sheridan.

Delighted to have come across your blog. Will be back.

Mick Hall said...

I doubt I could add anything to this, far to much has already been said about this infantile program and the self publicizing contestants who appear on it.

That the only politicians the capitalist media can get to appear on BB, have come from the left, should tell us all a great deal about our movements shortcomings.

With the middle east once again going up in flames, when employers are threatening to cut working class peoples wages and benefits, we get yet another self proclaimed leading leftists entering the big brother house.

If there is a joke to be had out of this it is on us, that I am sure. Is it any surprise working class people are reluctant to vote for us when people like Mr Sheridan are on a suicide mission. Lets hope the money men and C4 have promised him paradise.

harpymarx said...

I must admit I do agree with Mick and actually hope that sexist Tommy 'class fighter' Sheridan is on a suicide mission and he disappears into political oblivion after the perjury investigation. He appearing on BB sums up his shallowness, arrogance and vanity.

And Sheridan and his ilk give socialism a very very bad name...

He shafted the SSP with his desperation to hypocritically uphold bourgeois family values....Sheridan betrayed the class and I wish he would just feck off.

Cat said...

Gosh just read Harpymarx and she/he said exactly what I was going to write.

The Tanned One is in the BB house for 2 reaqsons and 2 reasons only - to trouser £x grande heard rumours of £50,000 and to get his fix of narcisstic supply.

I can't believe I knew this man, worked beside and at times looked up to him. I will never forget seeing him at a demo when I was 20 - it was electrifying but those days have gone and now I hate him though pity him for becoming what he has become - a shoallow self serving narcisstic arse. The Tanned One gave up on socialism a long time ago that is what the nonsense with his case against the Murdoch News International was about - chasing power, fame and wealth.

Its a sad day! And I will not watch it I will read the highlights in the Metro.

Madam Miaow said...

Hi Cat. According to the Scotsman, it's £100,000.
http://news.scotsman.com/entertainment/Tommy-Sheridan-oddson-for-Big.4841732.jp

Harpy's right.

BTW, you and I have more in common than you probably know.

Exploitation, sexism, bullying, lying, wholesale cynicism, elitism, cronyism and basic incompetence are rife in the left. We had a window after Blair got in to build the left before the inevitable happened. And now look at it! "Shibboleths" and "white socialists".

DAVE BONES said...

no no I'm not going to get into another of these reality shows. Its a slippery slope. Probably not as bad as buying an iphone but along the same vein of time wasting.

Renegade Eye said...

I come from a perspective as Rustbelt being based in the US.

Our last celeb radical was Abby Hoffman.


Regards.

Madam Miaow said...

This must be strange for you, Renegade, and Rustbelt, seeing it all fall apart here. Even though there's a surge in activity due to Gaza, there's nothing substantial taking root. It's all been demolished by Glorious Leaders over the past few years. Blasted to smithereens and atomised in a puff of ego.

I'm sure there are some who'd place the rot earlier than that but within my experience there's been a marked decay with naked self-interest, opportunism and careerism taking hold.

I'm saddened that we haven't been able to offer more hope to you guys across the pond.

Tony said...

Poor old John Rees, I guess he is just not famous enough to take the channel 4 shilling when he is bounced by the Comrades. Does the midnight shift on QVC beckon....

Madam Miaow said...

Strangely enough, Tony, QVC gets a large audience and it always surprises me when I find out which of my acquaintances watches it.

Also, one of my best mates is their techno-geek (LJ) and she does a bluddy good job under high pressure. It's great having a female friend who is a wiz when you can't work your video camera, or the computer won't recognise files, or the mobile wont sync up.

So, all far too good for that wanker.

Hmm, you pose an interesting question. What would be appropriate employment? Perhaps something where you address him with, "I'll have fries with that".

Cat said...

Poor John Rees I would not knock QVC though it can be rather soothing and the Day's Special Bargains are on at midnight not for the fainthearted in the world of telly shopping. I also worked in the Wimpy in the 80s - best job I ever had and Reesy boy just could not handle it. I wonder what he will do?

Yes the world has decended and as they say "no more heroes anymore". Whilst I have hatred in my blood and veins I feel sorry for those that promoted themselves as "Leaders" and then could not lead or succumbed to the dazzle of fame and fortune.

If the Tanned One is getting paid £100,000 good for him however the appeal for the News of the Screws has not happened yet, so he better spend it fast!

Anyway off to finish tidying up - can't lanquish on the setee in my jammies all day! No honestly I can't!

Madam Miaow said...

... can't lanquish on the setee in my jammies all day!

Ha! You, too, Cat?

Phil BC said...

You comrades aren't the only ones who skulk about the house in their jimmy jams and dressing gowns.

I have sort of committed myself to watching BB in case I get any flak "as a socialist". And everyone seems to be very nice and jelling well. But it's only 48 hours in ...

Tony said...

Madam Miaow,

I have to admit that the bland certainties of QVC are not unknown in our house as my and the Mrs lock & lock collection can testify. Its the crack of Tupperware, I tell you!
And LJ Rich is very good.
Yes, I stand corrected, Rees is far to dishonest for QVC. Time Share maybe?
And for shame I have spent the day in my dressing gown....

Cat said...

Oh my god no wonder the revolution has taken so long we are all watching telly and lying about in our pyjamas and slippers - though in my defence whilst watching CBB6 (its awfy boring I don't think I will be able to keep it up) I sewed my new curtains I have been making for weeks now. I also have a sore eyeball from not removing my make up before going to bed. AHH!

Did The Tanned One reallyneed to do the stripper song so early in the day? The psychologist on Big Brother Little Brother according to text messages I got from chums was that he is "faking it"

Madam Miaow said...

The psychologist on Big Brother Little Brother according to text messages I got from chums was that he is "faking it"

And another said he was "stiff" on entry.

?????!!!

A perennial problem, t'would seem.

BTW, I can take your curtains and trump them with all my filing that was crapping up my desk a foot high, a ton of laundry, and finished off the Xmas Baileys. Hic!

Any advance on that? (Actually, curtains is impressive.)

DAVE BONES said...

Poor John Rees? He has been... what? No one told me nothing. I have just been reading up in my usual "I don't know shit about the left" style.

I can't believe he actually wrote this after all these years-

It was agreed that we need to adapt as an organisation to the changing political climate and concentrate on grass roots campaigns as opposed to a top-down approach.

I am laughing a lot. That is hilarious. He of all people should have known writing such heresy gets you thrown out of the SWP!

So whats the score? Is it safe to be a lefty again yet? Just shout charge! I am right behind you!

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