Boy arrested for possession of pen on royal wedding day: video

A boy is arrested on the day of the royal wedding for possession of a pen. William and Catherine, this is what's being done in your name.

Thanks heavens we're not in China.

Another video showing democracy in action.



All in all, a great weekend for burying bad news and getting away with murder. More videos here

Royal Wedding Blues Pt II: the ruling class are 'avin' a larf, innit?

The gargoyles and grotesques who attended yesterday's publicly-funded royal wedding give us a glimpse of a confident, decidedly non-democratic ruling class in the ascendent. With a government of their own clobbering the very people who turned up to celebrate, they must be very happy indeed.

While I loathe the Blairs for their greed, worship of wealth and status above their own constituency, and his addiction to wars, the fact that the office of Prime Minister, one voted in by a landslide (even if he did turn out to be a scumbag), was snubbed like this, says more about what they think of UK subjects (for we are not free men and women despite all the PR to the contrary) than what they might think of the Blairs.

Meanwhile, lawful peaceful protest was crushed in a way that must have made the Bahrain torturer and Saudi despots feel utterly at home, and more bad news about further cuts to our NHS was buried.

Peter Hain may moan that Ed Miliband was given no TV coverage, but I think the BBC did him a big favour. Who'd want to advertise their consorting with this company? We need Ed to stand up to this carve-up, not tug his forelock in obeisance to his betters.

Which reminds me: that speech by Kate's brother, James Middleton, reading Romans 12, urging the Firm and their peers to 'associate with the lowly'. How sad it that? The rich man in his castle, the poor man at his gate and all that.

I appeal to you, brothers and sisters, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God - what is good and acceptable and perfect. Let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good; love one another with mutual affection; outdo one another in showing honour. Do not lag in zeal, be ardent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in suffering, persevere in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints; extend hospitality to strangers. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with one another; do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly; do not claim to be wiser than you are. Do not repay anyone evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all. If it is possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.

Yep, they get to decide 'what is the will of God', just like the 'mad mullahs'. 'Hate what is evil' but you get to decide what constitutes 'evil', and, wondrously, it is never anything you yourself have done. 'Serve the lord', especially if you or your mates are that lord. Sounds like a cushy number to me.

I say never trust anyone who says they have a hotline to the Divinity. Call for the men in white coats, instead.

Will and Kate are the pretty face of a ruthless bunch of rulers who have only just begun their counterattack on the workers and peasants who got too uppity after World War II; a period, coincidentally, of unprecedented creativity by the masses.

UPDATE: Saturday 30th April. An emboldened ruling class cleanses networking site of dissent. This lot will put China in the shade.

Defending Free Speech from the Zombie Flash Mob: royal wedding blues

7PM. My mate Roz Kaveney, poet extraordinaire, has joined my sedate birthday celebrations and reports that the Queer Resistance Zombie Flash Mob was put under heavy manners on royal wedding day since Chris Knight and his guillotine mates (both of them) were arrested last night.

Despite sitting quietly in Soho Square, Queer Resistance and the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence were approached by huffy plod and told to leave or face arrest (see video below). When asked why, they said, 'Some people aren't happy you are here.' Roz says it was breach of the peace by 'harshing someone's buzz.' At least they weren't the poor sods in Starbucks who were arrested for drinking tea while made up like zombies.

Ms Kaveney sees it both ways. She says, 'If they didn't do this, we'd end up like China.'

It's a dirty job but someone's gotta do it.

From Grassy Knoll to The Mall: Royal Wedding Expectations Shot

Americans have the best take on this monarchy stuff. Thanks to Rigorous Intuition for the above inspiration.

On the day that a Bahrain torturer attended the royal wedding while protesters in his homeland are being slaughtered, but Tony Blair and his power-worshipping wife did not (so it's not all negative, then), bad news is buried and another nail is hammered into the coffin of democracy.

Republicans (in the British sense) everywhere are being arrested, reminiscent of baptism scene in the last reel of The Godfather where members of the opposition are wiped out with every glorious crescendo of tiny boys' voices. Telepathic Heights raided. The Zombie Flash crew and anarchists in Soho: arrested and intimidated. The Brockley Guillotiners (aged 45 to 68): arrested. The NHS is told to institute further cuts as the BBC tweets: 'The regulator of NHS foundation trusts in England has warned hospitals they must make even bigger efficiency savings than previously thought'. And thousands of the very people who'll be hit the hardest when the boot in the face kicks-in for real string up bunting instead of royal purple parasites, and hold street parties instead of shooting the guilty parties.

Sigh!

Peter Hain complained that Ed Miliband was cut out of BBC TV coverage while there was plenty of David Cameron and Ramsay MacClegg, but this is surely a narrow escape as no-one with good taste and vestigial republican beliefs would want to be seen dead in this company.

OK, on to my birthday celebrations.

Laurie Penny's Royal Wedding of Mass Distraction

Walpurgis Eve Royal Wedding: commoner to be sacrificed

Kate Middleton's Friday night nuptuals

I KNEW it! One look at the date of the royal wedding between William and Kate makes it as clear as a Swarovski crystal gunsight what the occult aristocracy shoring up the monarchy have in store for commoner Kate Middleton. As any fule kno, 29th April is Walpurgis Eve, going into the witches' sabbath itself on the 30th, when deals made with satanic forces are at their most potent.

I've already predicted that the first-born will be sacrificed to ensure the continuation of the monarchy, but Stewart Lee has uncovered a Wicker Man scenario that makes much more sense than the Rosemary's Baby nightmare I foresaw. The first-born is a decoy. Duck, Kate. It's your lowly blood they want to fill up on like the contents of an overturned petrol tanker at an M11 truck stop.

The lash-up between the royal family and Beelzebub is already resulting in weaker minds among us being seduced by the romance of royalty, and renowned republicans are folding like origami. Only the other day I found myself in a room full of Orwell Prize progressive where a full two-thirds of the audience now found the royals more attractive than Marilyn Monroe and James Dean put together, and whose leader asked what was so great about elections and republics anyway? The Intellectual giant of the Fabian Society, Sunder Katwala, proudly swore allegiance to the Her Dark Majesty Liz The Queen of Everything and promised that, despite having once been a fearsome republican, he was all better now.

And what of poor Wills? Never mind: his second marriage will be happier and longer-lived. After all, he has his Dad to guide him through this one.

BTW, my birthday falls on 30th April. Heh!

Truly, there are terrible primal arcana of earth which had better be left unknown and unevoked; dread secrets which have nothing to do with man, and which man may learn only in exchange for peace and sanity; cryptic truths which make the knower evermore an alien among his kind, and cause him to walk alone on earth.
-From "The Diary of Alonzo Typer" Howard Phillips Lovecraft

Carnival of Republicanism here

UPDATE: 13:50 Thursday 28th. Squats raided before the royal wedding. Democracy upheld. Rah!

China's take on the royal wedding: Kate and Wills

Thanks to Blood & Treasure for finding this very serious in-depth Chinese report on next year's wedding between commoner Kate Middleton and Prince William Wales/Windsor/Saxe Coburg Gotha. So much closer to socialism than his parents' pairing, don'tcha know?

Where's a revolution when you need it?