Showing posts with label Miaow. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Miaow. Show all posts

Tuesday, 24 November 2009

Miaow now a drug as well as Madam's ace blog


Of all the things in the world and beyond that could be named after this blog's author, I never imagined it would be drugs. ("Oh yes you did," says Evil Self. "And you love it.")

"Miaow" is a plant food sold on the internet but newly discovered as having some sort of inebriant qualities. I've always wondered what flaming hoops early drug pioneers had to go through to find out that model plane adhesive, Benzadrex inhalers soaked in cola (doesn't work — just makes you puke, so I'm told) and now flower fertiliser can give you a high.

"Ooh, there's a pretty poppy seed pod. I wonder what happens if I slice it here and gather the sap ... and stick it into a vein."

"Just got to water the plants, love. Ah, sod the skunk, just nick their food."

The Telegraph says:
Apart from the euphoria and alertness it is said to induce anxiety, paranoia and a risk of fits.
Unlike Scotch, gin, vodka, rum, brandy which Telegraph journos all know is good for you, rejuvenates your liver, sweetens the breath and improves your mood the more you drink, Miaow kills you.

A scientist writes.

I wonder if I can get a sponsor.


Miaow now a drug as well as Madam's ace blog


Of all the things in the world and beyond that could be named after this blog's author, I never imagined it would be drugs. ("Oh yes you did," says Evil Self. "And you love it.")

"Miaow" is a plant food sold on the internet but newly discovered as having some sort of inebriant qualities. I've always wondered what flaming hoops early drug pioneers had to go through to find out that model plane adhesive, Benzadrex inhalers soaked in cola (doesn't work — just makes you puke, so I'm told) and now flower fertiliser can give you a high.

"Ooh, there's a pretty poppy seed pod. I wonder what happens if I slice it here and gather the sap ... and stick it into a vein."

"Just got to water the plants, love. Ah, sod the skunk, just nick their food."

The Telegraph says:
Apart from the euphoria and alertness it is said to induce anxiety, paranoia and a risk of fits.
Unlike Scotch, gin, vodka, rum, brandy which Telegraph journos all know is good for you, rejuvenates your liver, sweetens the breath and improves your mood the more you drink, Miaow kills you.

A scientist writes.

I wonder if I can get a sponsor.


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